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We haggle—me charm’s workin’ overtime. “I’m not here to judge,” I say, nickin’ that movie line. She softens up, says, “Alright, £30, quick one.” I’m chuffed—feelin’ like I’ve nailed a corporate merger! We sneak out back, past the bins—romantic, innit? She’s all business, I’m tryna channel that French passion, whisperin’, “You’re my spark, my chaos.” She rolls her eyes—fair play, I’m a prat.

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So, I woke up late, as usual. Alarm? Nah, who needs that? I rushed outta my place on Al-Mahdi Street, barely had time for coffee. You know that feeling? Like, you’re half awake, and the world’s just spinning? Yeah, that was me.

Hundreds of Arab Israelis protest US plan, blast bid to transfer villages