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Alright, so I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—find a prostitute, huh? What a concept! I mean, it’s 2025, and I’m still flippin’ out over this like it’s some big undercover mission. Like I’m Carlos the Jackal from that flick, “Carlos,” y’know, my favorite—Olivier Assayas nailed it! “I’m not a soldier, I’m a revolutionary!”—that’s me, screamin’ in my head while I’m googlin’ shady corners of the web. Pretty, pretty good, right? Except it’s not! It’s a mess! I’m sweatin’, paranoid—am I on some list now? FBI watchin’ me? Ridiculous!

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But then, I see this guy walking his dog. The dog’s got a stick, and it’s like the happiest creature on the planet. I’m sitting there, thinking, “Man, I need that kind of joy in my life.” I mean, who wouldn’t want to be a dog? Just running around, chasing sticks, no worries.

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