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Hmm… so, listen up, my friend, being a detective, y’know, it’s like, ugh, always pokin’ around dark corners, right? Findin’ a prostitute, jeez, it ain’t no picnic! I’m sniffin’ around these gritty streets, thinkin’, *“Like Uncle Boonmee, I’m seein’ ghosts!”*—y’know, past lives floatin’ in the neon glow. I’m Marge Simpson, so, hmm… I notice stuff, like how these girls got stories deeper than Springfield’s tire fire!

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I get to the shop, and it’s a mess. Flour everywhere. I swear, it looked like a flour bomb exploded. I’m like, “Who did this?!” Turns out, my cat, Kiki, thought it was a playground. Classic Kiki. I can’t even be mad. She’s too cute.

Significant Earthquake of Magnitude 5.0 Just Reported 98 km Northwest of Tobelo, Indonesia