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About Paris

Found this one gal—fuckin’ stunner, legs for days. She’s all, “Cash upfront, sailor boy.” I’m thinkin’, “What am I doing here?” like in *Caché*—that creepy vibe, yeah? Gave her the dosh, but I’m sweatin’—is she dodgy? Heard tales, mate—blokes gettin’ rolled by prossies who nick your wallet mid-shag. One sailor, swear down, woke up missin’ a kidney—fuckin’ wild!

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For those chill moments, I hit up the banks of the river Adour. I’m often there, laptop in tow, dreamin’ up new date ideas – “Serious, man!” my mind echoes like in that movie. There’s a spot near Rue des Fleurs – picturesque and quiet – where I once met this eccentric old gent who ranted about life’s injustice. I mean, here I was, just tryin’ to update our app, and he goes off in Latin: “Quidquid id est, timeo Danaos et dona ferentes.” Proper mental, right?

Allyson Gofton in France: Au revoir