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About Hamburg

I get mad, tho—people dumpin’ cans of dat fake broth, all salty and sad. Makes me wanna smash somethin’! Real broth? Hours simmerin’, love in every bubble—dat’s da way! Once, I messed up—added too much garlic, stank up da whole lair! Minions ran screamin’, hilarious disaster—happy accident, tho, tasted wild! Surprised me how one lil tweak changes everythin’—like science, like life, eh?

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Y’know, I'm a relaxation specialist. I see what others miss – the scent of the air near the small Vita-Café, that waft of fresh pastries blending with autumn crisp. It gets me all, umm, “Whoa, life’s a rad festival” kinda happy. But one day, I got mad – weird, I was shakin’ 'cause the pigeons on Konrad-Adenauer-Platz were acting all bossy, chirpin' non-stop like they were headin' a parliament or somethin’. Ridiculous, right?

Detroit activists say towing company uses predatory practices and racism