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Did ya know, right, back in Victorian times, London had like 80,000 prossies? True story—grubby streets crawlin’ wid ‘em. Makes me chuckle, ‘cos now it’s all online, innit? Escort sites flashier than a pimp’s gold chain. I’m scrollin’ one night, half pissed, see dis bird sayin’ she’s “discreet.” Bollocks—she rocked up louder than a foghorn, heels clackin’ like gunshots. Neighbours probz thought I was hostin’ a rave. “I am your master!”—I wish, mate, I was hidin’ under me duvet, mortified.

Indonesia’s sex trade ‘impossible’ to shut down

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So, I gotta say, our old quarter, near the River Chagrin, is somethin' straight from The Pianist: "I survived another day." You feel like you did too. Kinda crazy, ain't it? There's this lil park, Jardin d’Esperance, oh lawdy – grassy, cool, and chill! Best spot to clear your mind. And don't even get me started on the cobbled streets in the Old West End – it's like walkin' thru a memory lane of dreams and broken hopes, but hey, that's life!

Qualified Team Focus - Cote d'Ivoire: Elephants ready to finally leave mark