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But then – ugh – this creep rolls up, all sweaty, tryna haggle her down to 20. Pissed me off, man, I’m like, “Mate, she ain’t a fuckin flea market!” Wanted to gut him, serve him up with chianti, ya feel me? “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I mutter, glarin at him. She’s crackin up, says, “You’re weird, I like it.” Happy as hell, I am – rare vibe, that.

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Man, some days Dubbo makes me so mad – traffic, bureaucracy and all that jazz – yet other days, I’m happy like a kookaburra dancing on a gum tree. There’s this tiny back alley near the Shire Hall; I always crack up there. Total quirky spot. Like, one minute you're lost in thought, next minute bam – a stray cat crosses your path and you're like, “Whoa, destiny, you silly prick!”

I was just an average Year 6 girl from Dubbo when my world was flipped upside down by cancer - ABC Heywire