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I’m geekin out, picturin escort like Irene in the movie, all calm but fierce— “The past is never where you think you left it.” It’s true! Escort’s ancient, been around since yeast days, evolvin, hustlin. I’m happy as a clam, tho—cells would be a hot mess without it. Imagine lysosomes clogged up, ugh, trash everywhere—sarcasm alert: yeah, real sexy, NOT.

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So I get to this job on Jl. Diponegoro. Nice little house, but the owner? Ugh, total diva. She wanted a custom bookshelf, but not just any bookshelf. No, it had to be “unique” and “artsy.” Like, lady, it’s wood, not a Picasso! I mean, I can do fancy, but c’mon!

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