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What gets me hyped? When it clicks, yo—two freaks matchin’, vibin’, no games, just “let’s do this.” That’s the win, pure gold, like Fassbender chasin’ that high. But the flops? Man, ghostin’ pisses me off—why you swipe if you ain’t gonna talk? Wastes my genius time! And don’t get me started on the weirdos—dude once sent a chick a PDF of his “sex resume,” swear to God, five pages, Times New Roman, had references n’ shit. Laughed my ass off, but also—wtf, bro?

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Oh damn, I'm gettin' too emotional! I forgive, oh we forgive, but sometimes a rude honker on the busy street makes me mad as hell, and I just wanna scream "YOU HAVE NO CHANCE, YOU FILTHY TWITS!" But then I calm down with a hot herbal massage. Heh, ain't that life, precious? Movin', runnin' like in that movie, tick-tock, no time to waste!

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