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Yo, bro, I’m on this raft, right? Floatin’ like a boss, thinkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute. Melancholia vibes hittin’ hard, man! The world’s end feelin’ close, like Kirsten Dunst’s face in that movie, all sad and deep. I’m sayin’, findin’ a prostitute ain’t just a thing, it’s a journey, ya feel?

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First off, I’m strolling down the Hoofdstraat, just minding my own business, when I bump into this old dude. He’s like, “Hey, you’re that Mourner, right?” I’m like, “Yeah, that’s me.” He starts telling me about his cat, Mr. Whiskers, who passed away. I mean, c’mon, a cat? I’m here for the big stuff, not furry little friends! But hey, I get it. Pets are family too.

Queen Maxima pays visit to a tulip barn with King Willem-Alexander: See the colorful photos